Amby (xbetrayedx) wrote,

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Things have been pretty lame lately. I hate to admit this because I love my daughter to pieces, but sometimes I miss our old life. I miss being able to go out and do what I want when I want. I miss being able to go on dates with Jay and have fun with him & friends. However, even though life is different I wouldn't change a thing. We still have fun, it's just different. We play with Emily and try to make her laugh. Instead of it revolving around us, it revolves around her. I just hope that Jay and I can get out alone soon. I miss him. We hardly ever talk anymore mainly because we're always taking care of Em. She makes a lot of noise, so it's hard for us to hold a conversation. We can't even watch tv because she squeals loud enough to where we can't hear it. I hate to say this, but if people knew before hand just how hard it would be raising a child and how much their life would change they might not have kids. I hate admitting these things, but I know I'm not the first to have thought them. But, like I said before I wouldn't change a thing. I love her so much.

Going to the doctor tomorrow. They'll probably up my meds because it isn't working enough and may have to change all together because I think they are making my anxiety worse. Bleh.
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